Month: December 2021

Beneath the Stone

when the sky

was blue

it was a wing

that lifted me

off

way away

and i saw myself

from a great distance

radiating

like a diamond

dripping in the sea

that changes form

depending on the direction

of the light

too many diamonds

drown

i can see that

now

they fell

when no one

was around

the ink well

spilled

and made a mess

all over blue

it was as if

there was no day

no new day

all brand new

the pitch had

become

the day and the night

a clock that stopped

ticking

but way away

far from fear

the sky was blue

the clouds a puffy white

the wind a whisper

like a melody

and there i slept

for all my days

and all my nights

playing in the rain

walls of rain

that kept me safe

and sound

I still open the door

when it rains

so I can hear it better

and feel it

f

a

l

l

to the ground

deep down

into the ground

the dark cold

hard ground

where the sky

is always blue

and the sea

the endless sea

shimmers in the light

weightless diamonds

floating up

blinking and winking

like a star

on Christmas

TL

Charlie Woods

at 12

his dad

taught him

a great lesson

in endurance

that no matter what

happens or doesn’t happen

you adapt, you adjust

and you overcome

TL

In Repose

i sit

very still

and quiet

at the edge

of the sea

as it says

what it says

to me

i wonder

when it ever rests

maybe

on the other end

it’s as still

and as quiet

as me

waiting

for the sun

to rise

and sighing

as it

falls

beneath

there’s so much

going on

so much

i don’t see

or understand

or know

i feel like

a grain of sand

a drop of wave

picked up

and carried

and tossed around

then set me back

down

only to return

and retreat

in a rhythmic

and continuous

flow of time

a grain

is but a part

of something

more

something

infinitely more

as it travels so far

through time

and space

long nights

and dark days

in the crevice of a shell

tumbling and tumbling and tumbling

before it rests

in a bubble

of rain

and dries

in the breath

of a butterfly

and gets lifted

and carried off

in the careful hands

of a child

who will know

just what to do

TL

American Underdog

my dad

was big

on sports

he loved it all

I can see him now

jumping around

in his red pajamas

yelling at the TV

Go! Go! Go! Go!

jabbing the remote in the air

he’d get all worked up

over a touchdown

and laugh like a little kid

if it turned out

he didn’t miss a detail

or a call

or a play

or a look

he was all in

knew the stats

the style of the coaches

their history

how they recruit

think he loved the heart

you gotta have

to play full-out

other than sports

he was big

on movies

he’d read every single

credit line

rolling

and listen to the very

last note

to the ending song

and think about the story

long afterwards

if he was alive

on Christmas Day

Dec. 25, 2021,

he’d be sitting in the theatre

with a big tub of popcorn

a super-size drink

a bunch of candy (he smuggled in)

and a grin from ear-to-ear

barely able to contain

his excitement

over this new movie

he’s been dying to see

save me a seat, Dad

I’ll be there

soon as I can get away

don’t eat all the sno-caps!

TL

Christmas Lights

a night

of tiny stars

dropped down

and rested

on the windshield

glittering in the glow

Christmas all around

snow globes in every drop

catch the color

and spin round and round

like a blur

stars stuck on the shield

twinkle like a song

a streak across the glass

amidst so many drops

like a shooting star

before it blinks

TL

In the Kingdom

i can’t

re

member

a time

when i wasn’t

living in fear

it is so much

a part

of who i am

that i cannot

imagine

a life

without it

i have been shaped

by fear

from the moment

i was left

to the moment

he left

to the moment

she left

to the moment

i realized

i was

truly and utterly

a l o n e

no human form

i could go to

and tell

what was happening

in my small life

i lived in constant fear

and got good

at hiding my self

within my self

in order to survive

experiencing a death

so sudden

would further shape

my fear

i would always

be afraid

to love anybody

ever again

that awfully much

for it can break you

up

and leave you in

too many pieces

to pick up

and no matter how old

you get

you’ll spend the rest of your life

looking

searching …

for some speck

of who you were

before being

blown away …

i feel i’ve found

more than a speck

more than a piece

but whole sheets

page after page

of sheet music

blowing in the wind

that sings from the sea

and reaches

back

way back

to the part of me

that still believes

in fairy tales

and happily-ever-after

The End

TL

Never Giving Up

i suppose

to the outward eye

i’m just out there

hitting golf balls

in the early morning

light

day after day

chipping

and pitching

and putting

in the heat

in the wind

in the rain

in the cold

taught myself

the short game

without a lesson

pros tried to teach me

irons and driver

but it didn’t stick

still struggle on the range

but the short game

is all mine

and somewhere

out there

in the repetition

and rhythm

and feeling

blisters and Band-Aids

i found

myself

once more

TL

Come What May

it’s night

it’s cold

it’s been

one

of the worst

days

of my life

but not the

worst

no, not nearly

lived through

way worse

than this

small

insignificant

thing

that had me

crying in the car

for hours

it ain’t easy

being

a woman

I’m going through

“the change”

a month in

and it’s been

an adjustment

I’ve never been

a sweater –

someone who sweats

I can workout hard

and not break a sweat

but now

all of a sudden

like overnight

like a blink

I sweat

for no reason

at all

it’s like a flush of heat

washes over you

and you become hot

so you crank the air up

or kick the covers off

or roll your face with ice

but you don’t stay hot

10 minutes later

you’re cold

so you put the seat warmer on

and pull the covers up

and feel your face

but you don’t stay

cold

10 minutes later

you’re hot

my hormones are

way out of whack

my emotions are

hot and cold

you feel tired

but can’t sleep

you forget

what

you were

just about to say

then realize

it don’t matter

anyway

nobody’s listening

nobody cares

they got their own

problems

so after one

of the worst days

where you jest wanna crawl in the bed

and go to sleep

the day’s not done

yet

there’s chauffer duty

there’s waiting

you do a lot of waiting around

when you’re a parent

of a teen

who needs a ride

to this, that and the other

so it’s night

and it’s cold

and it’s been

a long day

and I’m sitting there

in my car

with the seat warmer on

and the AC blasting

and I close my eyes

and I just wanna go to sleep

I’m emotionally drained

but I open my eyes

‘cause I can’t fall asleep

in my car

and in the corner of my eye

I see movement

it’s a cat

a beautiful colorful cat

that just appeared

next to me

I roll the window down

and speak to it

but it doesn’t understand

me

so I get out of the car

and course

that spooks him

and he disappears into the bushes

I look for food in my car

something to give him

but I only find water

so I go over to the empty can

of food

that somebody left him

and fill it with water

he was thirsty

then I go to a nearby chicken place

and get him some nuggets

and another cat suddenly appears

and at first

they’re not that hungry

‘cause they’ve already been fed

but as time passes

they drink all the water

and eat all the chicken

they’ve had two meals

today

and now sit on the sidewalk

content

their circumstances are dire

they live in a gutter

and hide in bushes

with traffic circling them

day and night

constantly afraid

and yet

they are content

with their little lives

‘cause they have each other

and that’s all

that really ever matters

in the end

it could have been

way worse for them

they could have tried

to survive

on their own

all  a l o n e

TL