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Month: June 2024

Not Done

Not Done

one

thing

at

a

time

that’s what

i keep telling myself

one

thing

at

a

time

the-year-long-exhausting-heartbreak-process

of selling a business

done

14 years of her schooling

done

a place by the water

done

his hernia surgery

(that we keep putting off)

not done

finding her a safe place to live

not done

coming to terms with her leaving

not done

coming to terms with Granny’s rapid decline

not done

what to do with the house

sell it

keep it

renovate it

rent it

sell it

keep it

build again

buy new

what to do …

yeah, so not done

figuring out the next chapter

of our lives

not done

but yesterday

a small change

went and saw

that Chandu Champion movie been wanting to see

since the trailer

but kept putting it off

and almost didn’t make it

yesterday

was gonna put it off

but decided last minute

to make it a priority

such a small thing

and yet it wasn’t

such a powerful true story

about the human spirit

like all the great sports movies

that were ever made

it wasn’t about the sport

at all

it was about the heart

you gotta have

you gotta have a Lion’s heart

when darkness descends

and it’s hard to find your way

out

want them to go see it

today or tomorrow

‘cause Friday it’s gone

and it’s not the same

on a tube

gotta see it the way it was intended

but talking them into going

will be a hard sell

‘cause it’s not in English

based in India with subtitles

and there’s a singing part they could have left off

but other than that

well worth it

they need to go see it

today

and not put it off

such a small thing

but it’s not …

Not Done

TL

Microchip

Microchip

he built

the board

from a fragment

layer upon layer upon layer

like a bricklayer

‘til it rose

like a tower

casting a big shadow

on his life

he kept his head down

micro meticulous

he never stopped

long enough

to enjoy the view

from the top of the tower

he only saw

the Work

he would not

he could not

rest

whether a mountain trail

or an ocean view

at night in his recliner

or on his side of the bed

his mind

was still micro

like a winding clock

that would not stop turning

he took every call

checked every email

responded to every text

it was automatic

and timely

he liked being the man

who could fix all the problems

in a tech world

a troubleshooter

who could walk into any building

and lay out a plan

that would light up all the circuits

and have the place humming

in no time

he could remember every password

every code

every module

he spoke a language

encoded

in numbers

flying over the keys

call after call after call

he grew weary

over time

with worry

simple solutions

became more and more complex

within the distance

between his two ears

no matter how successful

he became

it was never

enough

he woke up one day

and decided to put his tower

on the auction block

he’d had enough

and sold it to the highest bidder

but things didn’t go

quite to plan

his tower was supposed

to stand

without him

there

he had set it up

to do just that

but it crumbled

under new ownership

right in front of his face

and there was nothing

he could do about it

but watch it

F

A

L

L

into a cloud of dust

it killed him

all the work

all the sacrifice

all the years of building

something

from nothing

g o n e

the micro in his mind

blinked

on and off

wracked with guilt

he won’t give himself a break

his view different now

he can see things

he couldn’t see then

like divorce does

it gives you perspective

he feels lost

in regret

and memory

there’s nothing to say

that hasn’t been said

each being has to find

their own way

back to themselves

it’s a different type of work

required

a different lens

a different approach

a different way

of being

some people refuse

to do the work

within

and nothing changes

for them

and they stay

as they are

‘til the day

they die

but some people

find a way

within

and continue

to grow

like a garden

well-tended

no matter the season

or the soil

“when you leave something behind …

you gain something, too …” – from the movie: Past Lives

TL

(written June 13, 2024, in my jeep at the park)