That I Loved You
25 years ago
today
your death
would change me
change the course of my life
and maybe I’ll never understand
the why
all I know is
you called me that night
right before
and we talked for the last time
you were just getting off work
and would be home any minute
that’s the thing about minutes
they never stop ticking
you can fall in love
and get married
and you can find yourself
a l o n e
pacing the floor at night
‘cause he’s late coming home
waiting is the worst
10 years can go by
and you become somebody’s mom
and you realize
this beautiful baby
has the power
to break you
like nothing else
could
and the minutes keep ticking
for all of your life
the minutes keep ticking
you can live through the hardest times
and accept what you’re afraid of
understand what’s out of your hands
that pacing the floor is part of it
part of loving someone so much
is the part I struggle to find
how to let them go
knowing what I know
some of us get to grow old
and some of us
do not
the whole of life
is in this moment
would that I never forget
in the dark of night
the lonely hour
pacing the floor
waiting …
would that I never forget
TL