Turn the Lights Back On
after all this time
away
Billy Joel’s back
with his beautiful ballad
that speaks
for every man
out there
who can’t seem to find
the words
every woman
out there
needs to hear
“I was wrong.
I’m late … but I’m here
right now …”
TL
Rose Garden
it’s the 4th
hour
again
I can hear
the rain
falling
the sound of it
wakes me
and lulls me
to sleep
it’s been a week
of rain
sheets of it
I pull the curtain back
and listen
the ground is saturated
with salt
a good day for mushrooms
and bulbs
but not pinecones
they clam up
like a turtle in its shell
wonder where the birds go
when it rains this hard
supposed to be an early spring
my favorite time of year
when everything’s in bloom
love is in the air
go to any grocery store
and it’s there
a pop-up rose garden
marked up on Wednesday
reduced by Thursday
dead in the vase
before March
it’s been a year already
turning the corner
the road ahead
untraveled
we’re all searching for something
shuffling stuff
around
trying to figure out the best
placement
what to keep
what to throw out
it’s subjective
do you cut the rose
or leave it
be
TL
Crossing the Line
she’s blinded by
love
and wants to hold on
to that Super Bowl feeling
so she ignores the red flag
on the field
the-in-your-face-one
that shoves
and screams
and shows
a side
‘ya never knew
but now ‘ya know
all you need
to know
somebody show her
in slow-mo
TL
The Color of the Sky
it started
quite literally
in pre-school
from then on
out
there was never not
a boy
in the picture
brains and beauty
and loves to laugh
it was
and is
an irresistible combination
she has had a hard time
owning her beauty
but not her brains
not her humor
at 17
she knows who she
is
and who she
isn’t
knows what she wants
and what she doesn’t
she’ll keep ‘ya on your toes
for sure
she was raised
with intention
to always think
for herself
looking back
I realize I worried about
all the wrong things
she’s gonna be ok
I cannot imagine her
not here at HOME
she can
but I can’t
they say it’s a blink
and it is
you wake up
and wonder
was it all a dream
then reality
sets in
thinking and knowing
are two different
things
I’ve thought about
this part
for a long time
but knowing it
is real
and real is
feeling it
in full
TL
Chapter 50
was driving
in the dark
in a daze
and didn’t even
realize
my lights
weren’t on
‘til I saw blue lights
in the mirror
and a kind face
at my window
wasn’t the speed
or the seatbelt
so I’m looking at him
confused
dazed and confused
and he tells me my lights
weren’t on
and sure enough
the knob was not on auto
and I’m thinking how can that be
and how could I not even notice
that
musta just happened
through the takeout window
2 bags of regret
maybe 1 of ‘em accidently turned
the knob
I don’t know but
the officer was nice about it
and said I probably didn’t notice
‘cause of all the street lights and all
and how he just wanted me to drive safe
and no accident
he bid me good night
I thanked him and said the same
and thought to myself
if he only knew
the day I’ve just had
he’d understand
why
lights or no lights
was the last thing
on my mind
I’d like to sit by the sea
and listen to the waves
and watch the sun come up
and go back down
and pretend life is
easy and breezy
and just begun
TL
Minimize
been a year
treading water
trying to find traction
but it feels like a pool
not the ocean
TL
Toby Keith
“don’t let
the old man
in
i wanna live me
some more
can’t leave it up
to him
he’s knocking
on my door
and i knew
all of my life
that someday
it would end
get up
and go
outside
don’t let
the old man
in
many moons
i have lived
my body’s weathered
and worn
ask yourself
how old would you be
if you didn’t know
the day you were born
try to love
on your wife
and stay close
to your friends
toast each sundown
with wine
don’t let
the old man
in
many moons
i have lived
my body’s weathered
and worn
ask yourself
how old would you be
if you didn’t know
the day you were born
when he rides up
on his horse
and you feel
that cold bitter wind
look out your window
and smile
don’t let
the old man
in
look out your window
and smile
don’t let
the old man
in”
she looks
at me
and says
why not
then a war
of words
ensues
the teenage years
are not
for the weary
weak
of heart
it’s like
you die
in the desert
slowly
and nobody’s
coming
to rescue you
but the death
is on the inside
it’s internal
on the outside
you’re walking around
and talking
and driving to the grocery
store
stopping at the light
and looking around
and listening to a song
and watching
a bird
and hanging electric lines
and shadows on the street
and the light changes
and you move through it
and walk in the gym
and stare at the bag
for a small eternity
then chop it in-half
for a fragment
and put it back
gather your stuff
and yourself
and walk out the gym
and get in the car
and sit in the silence
for an untimely time
this is hard …
you say to yourself
much harder than you thought
it’d be
and you knew
it’d be hard
emotional stuff
always is
it’s like Joni Mitchell
at the Grammys
tapping her cane
in the final Act
“i really don’t know …
l i f e …
at all …“
TL
Remains
the sun
the same
day in
day out
millions of years
above
land
and sea
it creeps up
then down
as constant
as a clock
as unchanged
as death
TL
Fisherman
he grew up
around water
his uncle pushed him
in
and that’s how he learned
how to swim
he almost drowned once
but an uncle-in-law jumped
in
water taught him
basic lessons
a boy should know
his father
his grandfathers
his uncles
and his brother
made sure of that
he drove a boat
long before he drove
trucks and tractors
he spent his summers
fishing off the bow
trolling along the edges
at the crack of dawn
catch and release
that’s what a lot of fishing
is about
catching and releasing
when you’re a boy
it’s all about the FISH
catching a fish
when you’re a teenager
it’s all about how many fish
you can catch
when you’re a man
it’s all about
catching and releasing
a fish
when you’re an old man
it’s all about
releasing
a fish
and watching it swim
a w a y
the sound of water
is essential
to the mind and its memory
an old man
laid up in the bed
can close his eyes
and hear the water lapping …
thumping against
the sides of the boat
and drift off
to sleep
trolling along
the edge
TL
Inner Spring
when
the green is
dry
like it never knew
the rain
or the weight
of ice
stretched tight
against the grain
it’s like
a storm
that never was
like it was never not
Spring
and people played
not
for cash
or metal
or autograph
but for the feel
the sound
the flow
the ebb and flow
of the greens
what it gives
what it takes
what it requires
in return
TL
Gray Days
a clenched fist
clenched jaw
clenched stare
out into the middle
of no
where
everything’s a fight
does life get
better
or worse
both
the clouds cover
the sun
the blue covers
the clouds
the rain covers
the blue
it’s never jest
one way
or the other
too many leaves
on the ground
too many petals
gone
a line of ants
duplicate
replicate
regenerate
it’s a constant thing
are you in
or you out
a poker face now
rap’s on the radio
a bird lands
at the edge
of a puddle
steps in
and bathes
wet feathers
in the rain
daffodils are just
beneath the surface
breaking ground
does the mirror show
the damage
does the clock
tell the time
did anyone change
the batteries
in the remote
if you didn’t make the mess
would you clean it up
anyways
or think someone else
would
or will
what if
they won’t
what if
they don’t
what if they
did
what if they
do
TL
(written in my car Jan. 24, 2024)
Roses in the Snow
there’s a soft glow
of light
just outside her door
it stayed lit
while she was away
growing brighter
by the day
ever bright
at her return
and the birds and squirrels
all know
it was not an easy go
so the birds sing a little louder
and the squirrels play a little longer
and there’s a hummingbird
vibrating just outside her window
he peeks in
for a millisecond
stopping time
but nobody ever sees him
but her
he’s waiting
for Spring
and his feeder
to be filled
to the rim
TL
Christmas Tree
golden leaves
awash in the sun
cling to the branch
of this bare tree
parked in front of me
these four bright bulbs
strung in a line
all lit up
at Christmastime
I stare at these leaves
that refuse to fall
in the dead of winter
they’ll be green in the Spring
when the tree bears buds
and begins again
birds will land and leave
and someone else
in another time
and place
will stare at this tree
full of leaves
and in the winter
of their life
the tree will be bare
blurred in the rain
lost in the wind
save for the branch
all lit up in lights
at Christmastime
TL
Across the Sea
on the ocean
so clear
drop the lights
there
bulbs that twinkle
day and night
no need for a tree
it should stand in the dirt
not the sea
no need for a gift
the day you were born
was more
than a wish
more than
a cave of stars
a heart can break
from too much pain
or too much joy
those are the moments
that move
like clouds
after rain
the peek of the sun
shining through
finding the sea
the wave
drop the lights
there
TL
Rocky
last night
I saw the real
Rocky
he was just
a little kid
sitting there
telling his story
his life story
he just wanted
what all little boys want
and need …
a loving father
someone to look up to
someone you could count on
someone who would protect you
someone who would talk to you
someone who would believe in you
someone who loved you more than himself
Rocky never got any of that
from his father
quite the opposite
so he turned his pen into a magic wand
and created the dad he should have had
the dad all broken men
should have had but didn’t
this was important not only for him
but for all those
who grew up
abused and abandoned by a parent
or parental figure
whether it was a mother
a father
or both
movies like Rocky
help the helpless
feel less
a l o n e
TL
Responsibility
there’s a grave
sadness
in the air
I can feel it quite
every
where
it’s in the vacant
stare
of that boy
there
that girl
here
after the camera clicks
the credits roll
the lights dim
the doors close
and every
body
goes on
home
the trash still needs
picking up
somebody has to stay
behind
and clean it
up
all the mess
else it’ll
pile up
and be too much
to bear
too hard
… too late
TL
Baby Blues
when she
comes back
I’ll be stooped
and low
looking at the ants
below
won’t see the sky
or stars at night
no sun
no moon
or tops of trees
or airplanes
headed out
I’ll see the drops
that fall
to ground
and remember
the river
her head down
picking up rocks
turning ‘em over
keeping a few
leaving the rest
yeah, when she comes back
I’ll be stooped
and low
looking at her
sole
wonder what she’ll wear
flat or heeled
or bare
TL
Willie Nelson
at 6
he was
a poet first
at 90
he still
is
TL
Through and Through
maybe
the journey
for each
one of us
who is born
and lives
and dies
has something
to do
with a returning
of who you were
before
life had a say
in it
before
you got hurt
before
you put the armor on
before
you put the face on
before
you walked away
from innocence
the innocence
of a child
the one who lives
within
each one of us
we forget this
in the process
of building a life
we forget
but in twilight years
we reach out
to this forgotten child
inside
and we see
what we could not see
and we feel
what we could not feel
and we know
what we could not know
until
we crossed that clearing
and moved further along
the path
of understanding
true understanding
that tells us
in the quiet
at the close of day
there is a morning
after
in every ending …
there is a beginning …
a transition
that is circular
TL