Marshall Mathers
last night
had a crazy dream
that I was sitting there
by myself
watching the Oscars
waiting for Rene
and I heard a familiar beat
when they showed a clip of 8-Mile
‘bout how music and movies can be magic
and then there he is
in the flesh
rising from the floor
bobbing to the beat
rapping what he wrote
what he won an Oscar for …
“Look, if you had one shot or one opportunity
to seize everything you ever wanted in one moment
would you capture it, or just let it slip?
Yo …”
TL
When it Rains
small me
would watch
t
h
e
r
a
i
n
f
a
l
l
i
n
g
and think
God is sad
TL
Just Away
in the quiet
i can hear the wind
brush against the clouds
brown blades turning green
seaweed in the sea
the tumbling of stones
in a river
weeping white butterflies
touch the face
of flowers
dancing in the wheat
the rain drops
down
gentle at first
before it floods
the street
and drowns the dream
underwater
it breathes
bending beams
in waves
nothing is hard
tears in water
never fall
TL
“Flowers for Algernon”
this was
required reading
that required writing
that required thinking
the tears were optional
it was one of those books early on
that stayed with you
all the way through
now my middle-school daughter
has it in her backpack
required to read it
required to write about it
required to think about it
the tears were optional
TL
To The Light
we do not
ask
to be born
none of us
do
and we that are
here
find out early
enough
that here
is no home
yet we stay
for a time
learning and re-learning
how to survive
and somewhere
in it
we learn
why we are here
not in function or form
process or purpose
but a matter
of depth
without measure or mile
for love is our lesson
for rich or for poor
not of the five senses
or the steps of becoming
well-traveled, rehearsed
in a life
full of distraction
there is this certainty
we carry inside
for if you have loved
like there was no love
in the world
and it broke you open
by its volume and weight
leaving particles of dust
in the air
then you know why
why you are here
and why one day
you too will disappear
from being
and like all things living
… return
TL
Delite
if it’s not
one thing … it’s
girl-scout-cookies
can’t say
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
to toothless pink pigtails
hopping up and down
with her curbside crew
chanting
she jest wouldn’t understand …
no-thank you-dear-everything hurts-when-you-get-old-
and-one-day-you’ll-understand-
and-have-20pounds-to-lose-and-unexpected things-
will-set-ya-back-a-notch-or-two-or-three-and-the-last-thing-ya-need-to-do-
is-devour-a-box-of-caramel delite-in-1.2
toothless grins wider when I hand her a $20
for five boxes of delite
and tells me what a GREAT choice I made
and as I walked away laughing at life
and heard them chanting to the next customer
I realized it was a great
choice
TL
Avalon
and even though
the red
of Christmas is gone
and the twinkle lights
went dark
and the trees all went
back in the box
or thrown out
to the street
and all the gifts are opened
and closed
like the year turned over
in memory
staring out
a lone winter window
at a field of gray sticks
their branches still strung
in drops that glisten
there was this gift
unopened
an ornament left
out on a limb
shining bright and round and
red
TL
Buried Bulbs
the water
ain’t clear
on the banks
of an Alabama line
but you go in anyway
like the rain does
and it’s hard to move in mud
wearing heavy boots
and a bag on your back
but there’s no way around it
but through
in the evening of an endless day
you imagine the daffodils unearthed
all lit up in the field
and you can feel their light
so strong within
they made it out of the mud
found a clearing
and pushed on through
nine months went by
and it’s good to see the sky
no longer dark or gray or blurred
but blue
TL
Cattle
that was
no way
to die
haunted by
that was
no way
to die
those dying days
that led to death
saved you
from the suffering
I would
so many hard things
of this world
experienced and observed
and often thought
just why
why does it have to be
this hard
why did it have to be that hard
isn’t there another way
has to be
… a better way
and I remember what you said to me
on a sunny-blue sky-bird breeze-day
and how I didn’t understand
how you could say such a thing
such a terrible thing
on that sunny-blue sky-bird breeze-day
I didn’t understand
TL
Stars at Night
broomstick trees
are swaying
in the rain
swept away the leaves
bare as bone
were it not for the lights
of Christmas
who could bear it
alone
TL
The Kite
birds in a
V
invisibly attached
to the kid
in me
unwinds in the sky
like a wake of water
before the fog lifts
or a traction of snow
a sled left
or the trail of a gown
as it glides
away
TL
Awareness
time is
but
temporary
so sayeth
the fallen petal
where they bury thou
underfoot
above the sky
so blue
the sun sits
with clouds
before it sleeps
and wakes again
the day no longer new
to one
yet to the other
brief before it breaks
in infancy
there were no words
aware the light
shadows in the room
the heart is heard
beating in the chamber
beyond what is real
the music plays
offstage
TL
Love Like That
the first time
you want for something
so much it hurts
and you’re told “no.”
is that the moment when
it kicks in
the c o n d i t i o n s
of love
little children seem to know
they just innately know
how to love something
or someone
without a promise
or a prize
there are no conditions
to it
it’s like they’re lit up from within
with an abundance of LOVE
so much so
they can’t contain it
so they give it all
away
without any thought
or hesitation
or expectation
it is the purest
simplest
most profound
love
there is in the world
the love that needs no return
it just is
and it’s what we search for
in the end
TL
Weighing on my Mind
5am
can’t sleep
make coffee
and listen to the train
huffing and puffing
down the tracks
sun’s creeping up
through the trees
and all the leaves
are hanging on
a moment more
before they spiral down
the winds are coming
awash with rain
time keeps moving
before I can
catch up
laying the plate down
taking it back up
did you remember what you ate
think I need a smaller plate
20 pounds
back to the gym I go
‘cause the gym at home
ain’t seen me
in a while
rice
noodles
and bread
“Oh, My”
looked up optimal weight online
5’1” should weigh 112
yeah, I weighed 110
back when
lots of living since then
“muscle weighs more than fat”
kept telling myself that
I don’t want to be 110 again
but 120
that’s the magic number
not sure which is HARDER
losing weight …
or maintaining it …
yeah, both
TL
Ashley
in a month
she’ll be
what she
always wanted
to be
married
she turned 26
in July
and teaches
kids in the classroom
what they ought to know
when she was a little girl
she’d line up her dolls
on the couch
and pace in front of them
talking
telling them what to do
and they always listened to everything
she had to say
she had an amazing imagination
she could have been an actress
I could see her doing those Hallmark Christmas movies
but she’d rather have the real thing
to fall in love for real
to open her wedding gifts today
one step closer
to standing beside him
the love of her life
looking into his eyes
saying, “I do”
TL
The Prayer
it snowed
in Birmingham
today
it started falling fast
last Sunday
and now the ground
is frozen solid
and everything is winter white
and hushed
like when they bring
the baby out
for the mother
and the father
to hold
promises are made
in that moment
whispered like a prayer
that only God can hear
and even as the years
open and fold
and the baby changes form
becomes an adult
the parent prayer remains
ever wrapped in mortal flesh
the gift of time
is a clock on earth
that stops ticking
today or tomorrow
but in Heaven
time is a continuous thing
like a circle
… unbroken
TL
Under the Stars
on the bridge
over the railroad tracks
in a tiny town I know
long lines of cars on the street
look like strands of twinkle lights
blinking white on a Christmas night
their red bulbs burning bright
leaving puffs of smoke in the air
and when they’ve all gone home
to their tree
I wonder of the street
stretched long
and all the steps that walk it
unlit
TL
Tiger Woods 82
champions
are
a different breed
you never
rule out
a champion
ever
TL
Window Pane
in the tower
of stone
high upon
the ridge
sets the sunlight
laced in sheers
a spider left
hanging there
gauzy
in the square
like a veil
over the eye
softening
the view
TL
Self-Worth
yesterday
a boy
called her
Mixed
last year
bullies called her a B
repeatedly
and she never flinched
but being called, Mixed
hit her in the heart
she’s gotten by thus far
without an uproar
‘cause she looks white
in any room
like all her white friends look
like how her Daddy looks
like how her grandparents look
like how her aunts and uncles and cousins look
but the kids at school know
how her Mother looks
and her Mother doesn’t look white
at all
so a simple walk from class to class
down the sidewalk
talking and laughing with a white boy
results in another white boy making fun of them
“Ew, she’s Mixed. You like a Mixed Asian …”
in that careless moment
her eyes were opened
and her world had changed in an instant
shifted somehow
her sense of belonging was tested
and she questioned her place in the world
her father and I already know how the world works
but she’s still learning hard lessons
in early chapters
I looked in her eyes and told her
whenever someone is mean to you
it’s a reflection of who they are
not who you are
so long as you know who you are
it shouldn’t matter what others think
but when you’re at a certain age
fitting-in is all that matters
the boy who walked and talked and laughed with her
stood up for her
against the other boy
when times get tough
you find out who your friends are
I just hope the best one
will always be
the one she finds
within herself
TL