Ink in the Blood Posts

Sincerely

pick up the phone

and put it down

dial but no ring

pick up the pen

and put it down

paper but no ink

what is there

left to say

only I loved you more

TL

Alive

and it’s a long way

up the mountain

white-haired man sat down and said,

“this trail is not for the old

but for the young”

the out-of-breath woman agreed

and the kid zipped by

and the ones with no quit

made it to the lookout tower

and were rewarded with rain

and down the mountain

the rain turned to hail

and after a zillion miles

back to civilization

in the comfort of the car

the ice thawed

quick as it fell

not a drop, not a pelt

smiled to myself

as the windows

fogged

TL

Falling

they took a walk

and the road

never gave out

and they talked and talked

and it was better

than talking to the wall

or to the dog

or to the stranger

or to the mirror

or to the operator

or to the headstone

or to the neighbor

or to the ticket taker

or to the “man in the moon”

or to the “woman in the shoe”

or to catmando

yes, it was far better

than talking

to the

nothing

to the

nobody

to the

nohow

to the

noway

to the

maybe

to the

if

to everything

up until

this

TL

Choice

which is worse

 

the afflicted pain

or the self-inflicted kind

 

all I know

there’s too much

of both

from here to there

 

folks I know

those I never will

was there a choice

for them

 

if so

why pain

why choose it

then multiply it

 

why

 

when there’s gold

in the meadows

glory in the hills

grace in the willows

 

why

 

when there’s a song to be sung

babies that need love

children that need

all of the above

 

why

 

when there’s still time

soil underfoot

and the road still bends

why then

TL

Annie

across the street

the carousel was calling

and my kid heard

laid down a $20

and bought some memories

and then some

the woman standing next to me,

a grandmother watching her granddaughter,

she tells me that Annie’s 6

and how happy she is to see her laughing

she could have stopped there

and said, “have a good day …”

but didn’t

Annie had a baby brother

but that was three years ago

it was a hot day

too hot to be left in a car

for that long

the on-duty officer turned the grandfather away

and then threw up

the mother, drugged out of her mind, had forgotten

her baby

now, she’s serving time

and her daughter, Annie, is growing up

without a mother, without a brother

she’s got her dad, but not really

her grandparents are the ones

who take her to town

to ride the carousel

TL

“Leap of Faith”

she’s talking

about 14 kids

her kids

how she was 10

when she gave birth

that first time

hard to stomach

but there were no lies

in those eyes

those sad, sad eyes

now turned inward

facing incurable cancer

said she refused to take chemo again

so she spends the last of it

in a corner shop

taking tourist’s pictures

in Tennessee

$12 an hour

three years she’s been there

her husband’s been dead that long

esophageal cancer took 25

she lights a cigarette

and takes a drag

and rolls up her sleeves

and reveals her strength

frog tattoos

“do you know what F.R.O.G. stands for?”

shake my head, “no”

“Fully Rely On God”

TL

Early October

the trees

of Tennessee

were lit  

… a welcome warmth

to the wayward traveler

who, in quiet desperation, left

the wires hanging

the boxes muted

turning down a two-lane

blaze of gold, crimson cast, orange peel

dripping wax down the sticks

puddles mixed in a slate dish

cool to the touch

a rain of ash

pouring down

that mirrored mountain

steeped in running rivers

and piping hot

a chimney cup

topped in

heavy cream

and dusted off

with cinnamon

TL

Millisecond

hummingbird

at her window

peeking in

zoom she went

grabbed her camera

off the counter

and flew back

to her room

hummingbird

was faster

TL

“Mirror, Mirror”

the king, the queen, the commoner

the legend, the lover, the loser

the matriarch, the minister, the mockers

the priest, the pirate, the pauper

TL

Aunt Cindy

she was

the younger sister

the golden child

always a lady

she married young

and had a son

and ended up

raising him alone

she was good

with numbers

and made a life

her mother came to visit

and never left

and there she was

young and beautiful

caring for her baby and mother

took its toll

weighed down on a small frame

heavyset and puffing

no one to turn to

so, she turned to food and retail highs

and as the years drew by

she found God

and cancer found her

and gave her back a small frame

she had no funeral

ended up in ashes

her soul finally free

to go home

TL

Retired

they don’t sleep

at night

they don’t wake up

in the morning

in late afternoon

they shuffle

there’s nothing

new in the paper

or on the tube

they’ve lived it

there’s nothing in the store

they’ve bought it

there’s no need for pills

they’re used to it

to this ache that never wanes

inside their shells

they’ve only just met

at the dime drugstore

and shared a milkshake

and held hands

and traded rings

and bought a house

and found the bedroom

their favorite room

and babies were born

and work was work

and children grew up

and they grew old

and the pilot light went out

and the night drew long

the wait unbearable

and they can’t even scream

they’re too tired to talk

they don’t sleep

at night

they don’t wake up

in the morning

in late afternoon

they shuffle

TL

Candles Burn

number’s changing

on the wall

level now

gone

the distance

half past

mirror down

fingers thawed

things as they are

under the tree

that prayer I prayed

answered in a different way

everything to live for

disbelief in all things good

believe the bad

the cruel, the custom-made

that comes a knocking

at your door

without a coat

of camouflage

muddy boots

and tracks

it’s the new

the squeaky clean

the polished patent leather

that’s got me shaking

parade of style

mask of power

steel toe

bolt the door

hush, don’t cry

barefoot in the corner

under the tree

TL

Midnight

three steps back

for every one

circle the floor

look up

at the chandelier

hear the strings

the ivory keys

was that my heart

somebody’s blocking

the door

it’s getting late

gotta go home

sometime

the gown’s too heavy

the slipper’s too tight

the expectation too much

there are no white knights

that was just a story to tell

but you can’t budge

the woman at the window

she’ll grow old there

like Mrs. Havisham

so, here’s a cup of tea

with honey

and here’s your song

hear the strings

the ivory keys

now, where was I …

TL

Funerals

nevertheless

she showed up

dress and heels

string of pearls

commandeered

an empty pew

way in the back

and found a spot

on the floor

and stared at it

it got her through

the appointed speakers

the poster prayer

the clammy hands

and out the door

to the blinding sun

and long, low shadows

to where the grass grows

and each crack in the sidewalk

draws you closer to your car

get in and shut the door

and take a breath

and turn the key

and drive away

wipers swishing

TL

Common Sense

the fly

found the fruit

pick up the magic wand

and he disappears

his radar ripe

in practiced flight

he’s gone to Kalamazoo

but he’ll be back

 he always comes back

when I’m gone

TL

Bravo

there’s a small bird

that sings

in this tree

outside my door

and it’s still dark

with the moon about

but this bird doesn’t know

the difference

tweet, tweet, tweet

and the sun must have heard

spotlight’s on the bird

it draws a second wind

TWEET, TWEET, TWEET

TL

Peaks and Valleys

could feel

the static

slight turn

smile waiting

familiar

but can’t place it

fumble for words

for he knows me right off

but I can’t quite

and it’s a game

gives up a point

and tells me

of course

now, I know

and it’s good

to see him

to hear his voice

his laugh

and know he made it out

should have said as much

but there was an audience

so we reached

for the weather

and football

and “have a good day”

and watched him

walk away

back to life

TL

Understood

you bore me

but I never say that

just nod

and inject, “Oh, yeah …”

they never notice

trailed away are they

some blessed distraction

and gone I go

to the books I know,

and they know me

from long ago

the girl I was

turn the page

and there I am

in the apple orchards

of Avalon

TL

Golden Years

they don’t talk

anymore

 

they don’t laugh

or yell

 

they don’t touch

or dance

 

they’re married

too long

 

they have separate

corners

 

they eat standing up

get even, sitting down

 

they’ve aged

early

 

they’ve stayed

late

 

they’re dead

on their feet

TL

 

Excavation

never saw her

again

the way she was

back then

never saw him

again

the way he was

back then

but the choices

were never mine to make

the heart doesn’t care

what you think or say

it goes its own way

through the dark forest

into the cave

over the bridge

across the desert

and into the sea

least I tried

got on the boat

and never bailed

went down with the ship

lungs burning

guns blazing

but love wasn’t done

hadn’t taken enough

so it drank the ocean

and ate all the trees

’til all was left

was summer sand

and a hand to dig

for water

TL