Ink in the Blood Posts

“Leap of Faith”

she’s talking

about 14 kids

her kids

how she was 10

when she gave birth

that first time

hard to stomach

but there were no lies

in those eyes

those sad, sad eyes

now turned inward

facing incurable cancer

said she refused to take chemo again

so she spends the last of it

in a corner shop

taking tourist’s pictures

in Tennessee

$12 an hour

three years she’s been there

her husband’s been dead that long

esophageal cancer took 25

she lights a cigarette

and takes a drag

and rolls up her sleeves

and reveals her strength

frog tattoos

“do you know what F.R.O.G. stands for?”

shake my head, “no”

“Fully Rely On God”

TL

Early October

the trees

of Tennessee

were lit  

… a welcome warmth

to the wayward traveler

who, in quiet desperation, left

the wires hanging

the boxes muted

turning down a two-lane

blaze of gold, crimson cast, orange peel

dripping wax down the sticks

puddles mixed in a slate dish

cool to the touch

a rain of ash

pouring down

that mirrored mountain

steeped in running rivers

and piping hot

a chimney cup

topped in

heavy cream

and dusted off

with cinnamon

TL

Millisecond

hummingbird

at her window

peeking in

zoom she went

grabbed her camera

off the counter

and flew back

to her room

hummingbird

was faster

TL

“Mirror, Mirror”

the king, the queen, the commoner

the legend, the lover, the loser

the matriarch, the minister, the mockers

the priest, the pirate, the pauper

TL

Aunt Cindy

she was

the younger sister

the golden child

always a lady

she married young

and had a son

and ended up

raising him alone

she was good

with numbers

and made a life

her mother came to visit

and never left

and there she was

young and beautiful

caring for her baby and mother

took its toll

weighed down on a small frame

heavyset and puffing

no one to turn to

so, she turned to food and retail highs

and as the years drew by

she found God

and cancer found her

and gave her back a small frame

she had no funeral

ended up in ashes

her soul finally free

to go home

TL

Retired

they don’t sleep

at night

they don’t wake up

in the morning

in late afternoon

they shuffle

there’s nothing

new in the paper

or on the tube

they’ve lived it

there’s nothing in the store

they’ve bought it

there’s no need for pills

they’re used to it

to this ache that never wanes

inside their shells

they’ve only just met

at the dime drugstore

and shared a milkshake

and held hands

and traded rings

and bought a house

and found the bedroom

their favorite room

and babies were born

and work was work

and children grew up

and they grew old

and the pilot light went out

and the night drew long

the wait unbearable

and they can’t even scream

they’re too tired to talk

they don’t sleep

at night

they don’t wake up

in the morning

in late afternoon

they shuffle

TL

Candles Burn

number’s changing

on the wall

level now

gone

the distance

half past

mirror down

fingers thawed

things as they are

under the tree

that prayer I prayed

answered in a different way

everything to live for

disbelief in all things good

believe the bad

the cruel, the custom-made

that comes a knocking

at your door

without a coat

of camouflage

muddy boots

and tracks

it’s the new

the squeaky clean

the polished patent leather

that’s got me shaking

parade of style

mask of power

steel toe

bolt the door

hush, don’t cry

barefoot in the corner

under the tree

TL

Midnight

three steps back

for every one

circle the floor

look up

at the chandelier

hear the strings

the ivory keys

was that my heart

somebody’s blocking

the door

it’s getting late

gotta go home

sometime

the gown’s too heavy

the slipper’s too tight

the expectation too much

there are no white knights

that was just a story to tell

but you can’t budge

the woman at the window

she’ll grow old there

like Mrs. Havisham

so, here’s a cup of tea

with honey

and here’s your song

hear the strings

the ivory keys

now, where was I …

TL

Funerals

nevertheless

she showed up

dress and heels

string of pearls

commandeered

an empty pew

way in the back

and found a spot

on the floor

and stared at it

it got her through

the appointed speakers

the poster prayer

the clammy hands

and out the door

to the blinding sun

and long, low shadows

to where the grass grows

and each crack in the sidewalk

draws you closer to your car

get in and shut the door

and take a breath

and turn the key

and drive away

wipers swishing

TL

Common Sense

the fly

found the fruit

pick up the magic wand

and he disappears

his radar ripe

in practiced flight

he’s gone to Kalamazoo

but he’ll be back

 he always comes back

when I’m gone

TL

Bravo

there’s a small bird

that sings

in this tree

outside my door

and it’s still dark

with the moon about

but this bird doesn’t know

the difference

tweet, tweet, tweet

and the sun must have heard

spotlight’s on the bird

it draws a second wind

TWEET, TWEET, TWEET

TL

Peaks and Valleys

could feel

the static

slight turn

smile waiting

familiar

but can’t place it

fumble for words

for he knows me right off

but I can’t quite

and it’s a game

gives up a point

and tells me

of course

now, I know

and it’s good

to see him

to hear his voice

his laugh

and know he made it out

should have said as much

but there was an audience

so we reached

for the weather

and football

and “have a good day”

and watched him

walk away

back to life

TL

Understood

you bore me

but I never say that

just nod

and inject, “Oh, yeah …”

they never notice

trailed away are they

some blessed distraction

and gone I go

to the books I know,

and they know me

from long ago

the girl I was

turn the page

and there I am

in the apple orchards

of Avalon

TL

Golden Years

they don’t talk

anymore

 

they don’t laugh

or yell

 

they don’t touch

or dance

 

they’re married

too long

 

they have separate

corners

 

they eat standing up

get even, sitting down

 

they’ve aged

early

 

they’ve stayed

late

 

they’re dead

on their feet

TL

 

Excavation

never saw her

again

the way she was

back then

never saw him

again

the way he was

back then

but the choices

were never mine to make

the heart doesn’t care

what you think or say

it goes its own way

through the dark forest

into the cave

over the bridge

across the desert

and into the sea

least I tried

got on the boat

and never bailed

went down with the ship

lungs burning

guns blazing

but love wasn’t done

hadn’t taken enough

so it drank the ocean

and ate all the trees

’til all was left

was summer sand

and a hand to dig

for water

TL

Fireflies

these are the days

marking the wall

the pinnacle place

sizing shoes

something new

a lighter hue

the songs you sing

and there’s the moon

and there’s the sun

and there’s the bug

where’d it go

can we keep it

and there’s the wrapper

I didn’t eat it

it must have been a ghooooost

or sooooomething, you know,

like that bad old, bad old, troll

oh, all right, all right, I ate it

and there’s the mud

and there’s the water

and there’s a butterfly

and there’s a bee

and there’s a frog

and there’s a fly

see that spider

watch that worm

is that a cricket

catch that caterpillar

did you see that

there it is

do you see it

right there

do you see it

did you see it

turn your head

now, do you see it

do you see it

yes, I see it …

I see it

TL

Car Wash

there’s a waterfall

hidden in this hole

in the wall

and for a few bucks

you can watch it fall

crash and cascade

like the rush of a wave

then drizzle and drip

“calm before the storm”

rumble of rain in the belly

bubbles blinking

then smack

goes the blue wax,

flecks of green and purple pigment

like seaweed swimming

feel like a fish

in a tank

nose against

the glass

TL

 

Alone

a cemetery

perhaps can be

a sanctuary

place without pretense

somewhere to go

and sit with stones

most of whom

you knew not

yet you knew them all

for they, too

lived and dreamed and lost

felt love in all its form

some died too young

others too old

some were already dead,

buried long ago

others newborn

names and dates

sometimes scripture

possibly a poem

plastic flowers picked up

by the wind

tokens tossed, taken in

and here and there

an empty spot

where the sun burns

and the rain soaks

and a bird flies over

and soles drift by

like swans on water

like a lullaby

TL

Cessna

took off

in a metal bird

left my body

on the ground

clouds were quiet

the sun was soft

saw myself

in a tiny toy car

stuck at the light

watched a stream of ants

go in and out the door

picked up a pool

and put it on my finger

glint of aquamarine

Lego houses

and broccoli trees

child’s laughter

left it there

with the sparrow

TL

Music Box

first it was

a plastic ballerina

whirl of white

spinning into the night

 

then it was red velvet

edged in antique gold

like a seat at the opera

longing for love

 

last it was silver

a cameo center

blue velvet

inside

the color of sky

a Switzerland sound

of a tinkling town

warmth of the hearth

frosted glass

full of flurries

TL