Ink in the Blood Posts

An Adjustment

man, I loved

running

could go for miles

and miles

that feeling

how it felt like flying

I miss it bad

especially, in the springtime

driving along

watching runners run

and this morning

the urge was so strong

maybe it was the wind

had to hold myself back

and keep on walking

when all I wanted was

take off

and it woulda been wonderful

felt like a million

but by this time tomorrow

I’d be hurting

limping around

not able to walk

yeah, walking ain’t running

not even close

but it’s something

and sometimes

something’s better than nothing

still

I almost, almost took off

this morning

looking down at my feet

I felt ‘em lift

the sparks inside

crackling

TL

The Voice

gave her an opportunity

and she didn’t waste it

at 15, Brennley Brown

brought the house down

win or lose

she did what she was supposed to do

she pulled you in

and held you

there

in that pure place

where the right words

at the right time

sung the right way

make you stop

and listen

and pray …

 

“I went up to the mountain

because You asked me to

up over the clouds

to where the sky was blue

I could see all around me

everywhere

I could see all around me

everywhere

sometimes I feel like

I’ve never been nothing but tired

and I’ll be walking

til the day I expire

sometimes I lay down

no more can I do

but then I go on again

because You ask me to

some days I look down

afraid I will fall

and though the sun shines

I see nothing at all

then I hear Your sweet voice, oh

oh, come and then go, come and then go

Lord, telling me softly

You love me

so …”

(song written by Patty Griffin)

Day to Night

right now

the leaves are resting quiet

it’s 80-something-degrees

the sky’s a robin’s egg

everything’s in bloom

birds and butterflies and babies

people are outside

mowing their grass

walking down the street

biking and hiking

and driving with their windows rolled down

just a beautiful day

but come nightfall

the leaves will be whipping wild

it won’t be so warm

the sky won’t be blue

all the blooms blown away

people will be inside

flipping channels

watching the weather

Alabama’s in the red

that ain’t good

no school tomorrow

there’s tornado talk

and rumored hail the size of baseballs

lovely, jest lovely

finally got my greenhouse up and running

and now it’ll be spinning away to munchkin land

oy vey!

TL

Pollination

but for

a moment

the bumblebee

disappears

inside the ruffles

of a flower

TL

“Ace up the Sleeve”

we met

in his garden

I call it his garden

‘cause he knows each plant

by heart

he likes customers like me

‘cause I have to have them all

he opens his doors earlier than his 8 a.m. sign

‘cause he’s old-school

and when he asks if I need any help,

he actually means it

if it weren’t for his injured shoulder

he’d of gladly lifted and loaded my four bags of soil

instead he calls for someone else

in the meantime, I ask him how he hurt himself

and he tells me he fell

tripped over some cement bumper thing in a parking lot

and that was that

now, he’s hoping physical therapy will keep him outta surgery

he’s learned how to adapt and adjust

from cast to sling

there’s a sense that he can do this with most anything

before I go, I ask him if he can order certain plants

he says he can

and I ask him if he can order lily of the valley

he says he always carries that and to check back

in 2-3 weeks

a shipment should be here then

I can’t believe it

my first flower will be here in 2-3 weeks

just like that

he has no idea what this flower means to me

but I do

in 2-3 weeks

tiny white bells will ring

TL

Journey

in all the world

across the great ocean

the highest peak

the meadow between

 there is the sky

with its orbs of light

revolving

the same as then

the same as now

the same as after

in ancient times

this present day

there are clouds

that shift

by day

and stars

that blink

by night

seek the sun rise

and set

feel the rain

each path is different

do not hurry

it goes by so fast

TL

In the Smallest Thing

Mia

the mini

hamster

died in her food

bowl

shortly after Papa’s fish

floated away

and now, there’s a white moth

an “Agreeable Tiger Moth”

found at the front door

and thought to be dead

by the wing

toted him in

and set him down

startled by his sudden movement

he wasn’t dead

but tired

from the night before

too weak to take off

he’s resting on my desk

amid two tomato leaves

and a drop of watermelon

he made it through the night

no, I don’t expect him to live

long

only in my memory

this moonlit moth

that landed at my door

and gave me pause

TL

Left Behind

in six lanes

of traffic

in the spring of the year

somebody’d lost

their pieces

along the side of the road

there was a shoe

it looked like a good shoe

there was a shirt

it looked white

or maybe it was blue

there were other things, too

but it all went by so fast

colors blurred

only that there were

things

scattered things

left on the side of the road

and it felt like rain

coming down

TL

Bridges

he believed

in the magic

of great love

and wrote about it

in such a way

that it resonated

in the heart of the reader

this notion that two ordinary people

coming from two different directions

one a world traveler and one who’d never been anywhere

could meet

on an ordinary day

in the middle of their lives

and experience an extraordinary love

beyond reasoning

beyond reality

beyond circumstance

“it all fades away”

(Robert James Waller, 77, March 10, 2017)

TL

Butterflies

from

the very

moment

of our infancy

we become

but a memory

of our former selves

there is no returning

to any state-of-being

in the original form

the mind remembers

the sights and sounds and smells

the taste and touch

it can be conjured up

but it cannot be re-lived

as it was

an old man can return to his boyhood bed

and lie down and go to sleep

but will wake up not as a boy

the body of the boy and the mind of the boy

is gone

but the feeling is still there

an old lady can go to her closet and pick out

the dress she wore

and put it back on

but when she stands in front of the mirror

the girl is gone

but the feeling is still there

once you leave a state-of-being

you become infinitely more

than you were

the whole of life

is connected

in transformation

TL

Drained

in the wee

hours of

the morning

your little blue

fish

floated away

TL

Springtime

in the quiet

stillness

spring grows

stronger

a prelude

to summer

and an ending

to winter

perhaps nowhere

does it seem

such

TL

as i am

when i was

a child

i disappeared

inside myself

and locked the door

it was a way to cope

with the uncontrollable

circumstances i found myself in

i felt like a prisoner

time forgot

and it didn’t matter where i went

or what i achieved

or what dreams i had

i couldn’t escape

even when i physically had

moved out and on

the inner child

was still stuck

in uncontrollable circumstances

beyond my control

my need for control in all things

is apparent

I crave simplicity

simple things like taking a walk

i took a lot of walks growing up

i felt at peace in nature

there was connection there

an unspoken truth

i knew no matter how dark the night

the sun would rise in the morning

i knew that daffodils would go away and come back again

like the monarchs

i knew the trees offered shade and strength

i knew the sun would kiss the water

and diamonds would appear

like stars in the sky

i knew the wind would fill me

the rain renew me

the sunlight sustain me

these were things i could count on

things that didn’t require

anything of me

for they were free

those were the gifts

He gave

to me

TL

Into the Night

the black sky

spit out the stars

and when they hit the ground

they shattered

into drops

that disappeared

into the dirt

years go by

24 years

and a forest appears

bringing birds

that sing

TL

Fields

she colors

the sun yellow

and brings down the ray

to the green grass

that moves like the leaves

in the weeping trees

fluid like clouds in blue water

I lie down

and pick a flower

and twirl it round

and watch a squirrel scurry up

down

where the birds are

the turtle takes its time

to get to the other side

the rabbit’s chewing a carrot

the cows are chewing grass

the horse is chewing hay

the ladybug’s chewing a leaf

a butterfly takes a dance

across the wind

the hummingbird checks in

there are shadows on the ground

mountains in the distance

a garden full of roses

red apples in the trees

purple grapes on the vine

a path that leads

to a cottage

the windows are yellow

like the daffodils by the door

that come back waving

each year

TL

Dollhouses

it never

occurred to me

why

I love dollhouses

so much

why a grown adult

would rather have a dollhouse

with a miniature family

and all its miniature pieces

over diamonds and gold

a dollhouse symbolizes

something constant

something secure

it’s a lovely, happy, peaceful place

to live

the orphan in me

loves the little family

that lives in the little house

with all its little things

the mom in the kitchen

the dad at the table

the baby in its crib

they’re all together

forever

TL

…

she sat

by the sea

TL

Hallway

after you

went and died

your son gave me

a packet of pictures of you

for my birthday

I saw you as a young man

but my favorite

was the picture of when

you were a boy

in a blazer and tie

the look in your eyes

was the same I remembered

I put that picture in a frame

and put it by my bed

‘cause it helped me sleep at night

remembering you like that

it helped me deal with your death

waking up and going to bed

and walking around

and around

it’s been a year

a little over a year

and it doesn’t hurt like it did

I hung your picture on the wall

‘cause I can finally sleep at night

without you there

beside me

TL

Flickering

there are

violets in Tanzania

blue violets

picked in the mines

the darker the day

the more brilliant the color

like a diamond

in a black box

a star at night

TL

Unparalleled

the aging process

is a quiet thing

like a knife

that runs along the skin

first you don’t even realize

just stings and goes away

you go make plans

on summer days

and all the while

the cut creeps down

the middle

and there’s an ache

that wasn’t there

and you forget

what you were gonna say

the phone rings

so you talk about that

and it’s tomorrow already

your child is grown

that place on the corner closed

the two-lane turned four

so and so just had a baby

you gotta find something to wear

to that thing

when did it get so cold

foot’s cramping

the knee stops running

stuck on a wheel

hair’s losing color

skin’s losing layers

the neck starts dropping

the face has a ripple effect

that spreads all over

the body

you’d rather stay home

and watch it on television

yeah, it hurts

to get old

I’ve watched it

on others

saw it for myself

the slow decay

and what it does

to you

mentally

physically

emotionally

the cut gets torn

wide open

like a broken zipper

on a jacket

you can’t close

when did it get so cold

colder still

TL