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Ink in the Blood Posts

Ladder

Ladder

at his

small square

table

we sit

and talk

and his mind

is full of light

pointed up

to the bulb

and told me

it was new

how it gave off

more light

supposed to last

longer

and I ask him

who put it up there

for him

and he gives me

this look

“I did.”

and I give him

this look

“What … but how?”

and he laughs

“With a ladder …”

and I laugh

“But how did

you move

the table?”

and he says,

“I didn’t move it;

I just worked around it.”

and in my mind

I’m thinking

how long

it must of took him

to get that ladder out

and walk it from

where it was

and open the door

and maneuver it

inside

through the kitchen

the doorway

and open it

without knocking

stuff over

and then

put his foot

on the rung

and pull himself up

to the next

‘til he reached the top

and stood there

breathing

how he had to stretch

his arm

and extend his fingers

to reach the broken bulb

and slowly turn it loose

‘til it rested in his palm

how he probably put it

in his pocket

and took the other out

how he carefully held it

like an egg

and fit it

in the circle

and turned it

‘til secure

how he must of felt

standing on that ladder

way up high

changing that light bulb

like it was the sun

in the sky

how it was

something

he could cross off

his list

something

he had control over

something

that made sense

and maybe he lingered

up there

‘cause he knew

what it was like

down there

where his wife wanders

in and out of rooms

and can’t recall

much at all

how she was told

about their boy

how cancer

took his head

how he has

but a day

an hour

a second

to linger

she doesn’t know

they will outlive him

hope you took your time, Papa,

getting down off that ladder

TL

Someday

Someday

what of

the broken

moments …

what do

you do

with them

all

do you

have a place

you keep ‘em

or no place

at all

do you

gather ‘em up

and drop ‘em low

or leave ‘em

lone

thinking someday

not today

and how many

before

how many

after

went that way

thinking someday

just not

today

TL

Nevertheless

Nevertheless

sticks are

sprouting

wisps of hair

washed in rain

the length

measured

before

the tree

was there

to shade

against the glare

of a silent sun

and a day

that missed

its morning

TL

Teacher

Teacher

heard

her heels

click, click, click

on out the door

four years

up and down the hall

heard

her heels

click, click, click

seemed she

always knew

where she was going

click, click, click

a planner by nature

a worrier by birth

a corrector by habit

she was a mentor

to a kid

who needed mentoring

and the books

she gave

were magic

“It was the best of times,

it was the worst of times …”

and I’ve missed her

O how much

TL

20

20

New Year’s

day

is March

to me

always be

March

to me

dead …what was that

didn’t know

that

20 thought she knew

1+1 makes 2

and if you

cross the t

and dot the i

somehow

you’d dodge

that bullet

but down went

20

hit the cement

cold

body got up

as bodies do

but inside

got stuck

as insides do

stuck in the moment

‘cause you left me

hanging

on the line …

and i’m still

holding the phone

‘cause you said

you’d be home

and i’ve waited

for you

to come home

20 years

now

you know

i know

and when

i’d go

to your grave

and sit in

your blade

wasn’t to see you

you know

’cause i knew

you weren’t there

but the girl i knew

was

the me

i was

with you

will always

be

there

and i thought

about the ticket

and getting on

that plane

and going

to see her

today

but see

i have

her now

and she

needs me

you know

the way

i needed you

and she

loves her daddy

the way

i loved you …

love you

still

TL

“Forget-Me-Not”

“Forget-Me-Not”

s t a n d

where …

you are

and feel

the ground

beneath

and walk

its dirty streets

not

point-to-point

but

here to there

and rest

not on concrete

steps

but

along its

ever blade

and sleep

not on bricks and mortar

but

in its puddle

full of drops

and sit

not in somebody’s seat

for it’s already

taken

but

in its fallen leaves

the stillness

of the heart

for the earth yields

what love forgot

what time

does not

TL

Drip

Drip

lights are

still up

blinking

on boxes

lined in

a row

and last

night

they were

blurry

like a Monet

wipers like

brushes

dabbing

and dipping

framed

in the shield

the movie

just watched

like the single

cup of cappuccino

drunk

like the smallness

of the shelf

they built

at the bookstore

for Frost

and other

dead poets

like the song

Chesney sings

to me

and me

alone

like the

street

dressed

in sequins

the lamps

like sticks

in silver

holders

standing

apart

the wax

warm

and willing

to bend

a bit

before

it hardens

on the

table

TL

Aspect

Aspect

in the circular

silence

of our lives

we return

and away

are the massive

amounts

of consumption

our mind and body

did wallow

and it matters not

those things

those blistering things

that kept you

hemmed in

and you see

the sun

break through

the gray

and change

the direction

of your eye

from ground

to sky

an ancestral

tribe

TL

Suicide

Suicide

lack of love

is that

the trigger

that took him

before He could

lack of love

is that

the pill

that took her

before He could

lack of love

is that

the reason

for the letter left

lack of love

is that

the reason

for no words

lack of love

did no one see

the pain

welled within

TL

To Night

To Night

i believe

He in Heaven

weeps for we

for the you in me

and the me in you

that somewhere

rain is falling

all around

the world

and some

are drowning

in such sorrow

for what

would have been

their tomorrow

TL

Depends

Depends

some girls

want diamond

rings

and pretty things

picture places

wrinkle erasers

some girls

want bars of gold

and fast cars

bottles of booze

warm body, anybody

some girls

want a smooth line

gets ‘em every time

miles of smiles

tattoos “love you”

some girls

want Friday nights

and glitzy lights

casino fights

liqueur laughter

some girls

want happily-ever-after

and white knights

royal weddings

a pink palace

that’s what

some girls want

for me

it was always

something real

like the moon at midnight

all those stars

sun sipping the sea

bird on the breeze

an old oak tree

rain on my skin

bathing within

unpicked roses

message in a bottle

fresh cut grass

lying on your back

shaping clouds

aimless acres

rushing water

untouched snow

songs you can’t let go

falling in love

a good book

an empty pew

a second glance

slow, slow dance

bit of romance

intensity

that’s just me

TL

Streets

Streets

headed home

stopped at a 4-lane

looking at lights

and a young man

appears

crossed the street

and stood at my window

his eyes soft and sad

mumbled something

his breath a bottle

“Mama, who was that man?”

and as we watched him

disappear into the night

I looked at her

in my rearview mirror

and just said,

“someone who needs

a prayer”

TL

The Game

The Game

and the ball’s

back in Alabama

where Saban

was a fan …

“bout had a heart attack”

and you

marvel at greatness

wherever, whenever

and wonder

at its shape

its cut

its line

wonder

how to define

for always

when you win

anything

worth winning

you lose

something

in return

TL

Dial Down

Dial Down

in my

midnight ride

i reach

for the me

i know

is in there

somewhere

and i take her

down the road

where time

and place

and pleasing

have no hold

where the cataract stares

of the couple in the car side me

have no control

and i crank it up

to the nth decimal

‘til the sound reverberates

a sudden earthquake

and i can feel myself

let go

as Seger and i sing it …

“Roll Me Away …”

“Still the Same …”

“Against the Wind …”

thank God for him

TL

Wherever Was

Wherever Was

peered into

a plastic kaleidoscope

and watched

the colors turn

round

gazed across

the sea

and saw

the waves

frown

stared at

the fall

of rain

growing gray

to ground

glimpsed a

silhouette

on the bridge

stopped and still

blinked at

the puddle

on the street

and saw

a child

look back

TL

Inheritance

Inheritance

when you

clock-out

for good

early or late

or on-time

matters not

no more

left

as you came

naked

stripped of

faces you war

love you lost …

found

armor you donned

the shield, the sword

put down

for the pain

is for

the newborn babe

who will

wear the faces

you war

and acquire the armor

you hid in

for sun and shadows

are like

love and hate

Heaven and earth

joy and sorrow

yesterday, tomorrow

TL

Room

Room

before

the stone

is laid

the earth

makes room

a square room

without ceiling

window or door

where rays of light

warm it

by day

the moon

by night

in a cycle season

of return

much like the rain

falling

from the sky

the room is filled

with drops

and when the living leave

and the day ends

and begins again

there are butterflies

that float across the flowers

their wings brushed

with sunlight

TL

Pennies

Pennies

woke up

yesterday

when i was young

and the road

was

and i was

and it was

like my daughter

is

was i ever

that …

sure

that filled

that loved

TL